What kind of person would tip a hard working airport porter in foreign currency? Paris Hilton, bien sur. I spied her handing a fist-full of Australian money to the poor man schlepping her suitcases as she arrived at LAX from Sydney.

Did you (foolishly) expect PH to be less awful than this? Or does she make Kim Kardashian look like Mother Theresa?

Photo credit: Splash News

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Breaking News: Paris Hilton is Still Awful

It’s no wonder Nicki Hilton is looking for a new BFF. I hear that her sister Paris ditched her pals in a major way this weekend in Miami. Apparently PH rolled up to club Mansion with an entourage of dozens to see her boyfriend DJ Afrojack spin. But when the bouncer would only let Paris pass, she happily abandoned her friends at the door. Instead, she only took in her personal photographer, who spent the evening snapping pics of her dancing in the DJ booth.

At this point, are you shocked that Paris isn’t exactly the most considerate person on Earth? Or is her idiocy totally expected?

Photo credit: Splash News

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Paris Hilton: Worst Friend Ever?

For all the (nonexistent) people on earth who have craved a poorly-written, un-listenable song about drunk texting, then Paris Hilton has come to your rescue. Take a listen (if you dare) to this incredibly awful ditty by our less-than-favorite socialite…

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Did Paris Hilton Make the Worst Song in the World?

Grab your hankies, dear readers, because Paris Hilton is out of a job. Her boring-yet-annoying reality show The World According to Paris has breathed it’s last bedazzled gasp. I hear that Oxygen pulled the plug on the series and says there’s no shot of renewing her unpopular show. Obviously, I have nothing against rich girls on TV, but didn’t you expect more dramz and less ditz from our favorite heiress?

Photo credit: Splash News

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Paris Hilton Hits the Unemployment Line

Usually pin-thin reality star Paris Hilton was looking a little rounder in the tummy when I spied her at an appearance at The Grove in LA–but is her bump the result of bad posture…or bad birth control? If there is a mini-Hilton in the works, do you think Paris should get back together with her ex, Cy Waits? Or could Miz Hilton handle motherhood solo? And no, you’re not the only one shuddering at the thought…

Photograph by Splash News

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Is Paris Hilton Pregnant?

Paris Hilton has been acting downright demure lately, but alas, all good things must come to an end. I hear the heiress ended her streak of ladylike behavior after her appearance on The View–apparently Miz Hilton screamed at producers over her less-than-kind interview and canceled a slew of other press appearances. The reality star expected an easy breezy convo about her new reality show, but Barbara Walters instead grilled Paris about not doing enough charity work on her “frivolous” series. Do you think Babs was right to ask Paris some hard-hitting questions?

Photograph from Splash News

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Paris Hilton’s Ugly View

One would be hard pressed to describe Paris or Nicky Hilton as “muted and bland,” but those are the most precise words to describe the outfits they wore last night in New York City, where they jetted from the Gansevoort Hotel to The Darby. While I’m not usually a fan of drab neutral colors, both heiresses dazzled in subtly sparkly earth-toned dresses. But as you know, my little minions, only one can take the catwalk cake. Do you love Nicky’s slouchy grey dress or Paris’ typically tight cream mini?

Photograph by Splash News

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Fashion Faceoff: Paris and Nicky Hilton

“People assume ‘Oh, she’s a slut’ because of one thing that happened to me and it’s hard because I’ll have to live with that for the rest of my life and explain it to my children. And it’s something that’s changed my life forever and I’ll never be able to erase it. [It's] the most embarrassing, humiliating thing that has ever happened to me in my life.” –Paris Hilton moans to Piers Morgan about her infamous X-rated tape. Do you feel sorry for the poor little rich girl or should she have realized that all dirty secrets eventually see the light of day?

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Scene & Heard: Paris Hilton

Any celeb worth her Chanel will tell you that clingy, white satin is a risk when it comes to the red carpet. But Paris Hilton, ever the rebel, ignored the rules and scored an unflattering trifecta in the white dress she wore to the Wango Tango concert in LA. Even the super-slim reality star looked lumpy and bumpy in her shiny, skin-tight frock.

Photograph by Splash News

Need some pointers on how to wear pales? Look no further than American Idol‘s Pia Toscano, who chose a snowy dress in a more flattering material, which helped prevent unsightly ripples.

Photograph by Splash News

Which starlet looks white hot to you?

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Fashion Don’t: Paris Hilton’s White Fright

“I’m freaking out! I can’t believe I’m going to be 30! But at least I still look like I’m 20!”—Paris Hilton freaks out about her 30th birthday . . . with a touch of classic Hilton humility. Considering the heiress never met a party she didn’t like, she’s miraculously well preserved, don’t you think?

Photograph from PR Photos

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Scene and Heard: Paris Hilton